The Second Sex
Monday, April 27, 2015
Saturday, April 25, 2015
Don't Be Absent for Transgender 101
In last night's two-hour ABC interview, Bruce Jenner, no stranger to media attention, explained to Diane Sawyer and nearly 17 million viewers, his internal struggles with being transgender, a part of himself he has kept hidden for decades.
“For all intents and purposes, I’m a woman."
Though he identifies as a woman, for the time being, Bruce still uses masculine pronouns for himself, so I will do the same in this post, though in the interview, he also referred to himself as "Bruce" and "her". Bruce has not yet revealed to the public the female name he has chosen but jokingly insisted that it does not start with a "K" and that "she is definitely a Jenner" in regards to his famous reality TV family so many, like myself, Keep Up With.
“My brain is much more female than it is male. It’s hard for people to understand that, but that’s what my soul is.”The reason this is so hard for people to understand is because we live in a heteronormative society, which entirely neglects and alienates groups of people. As is the problem with a white-centric, cis-centric feminism, which intersectional feminism hopes to address, so, too must we recognize that we need to start changing the way we talk about gender and sexuality in order to stop marginalizing groups.
Bruce Jenner has become "the unlikely center of a national dialogue around gender." Sawyer's questions and clarifications, paired with Jenner's genuine honesty and patient explanations, hopefully will establish once and for all that sexual desire and gender are too separate things. When Sawyer asked Bruce if, since he identified as a woman, but was attracted to women, if that made him a lesbian or how that worked, he cautioned her:
"You're going back to the sex thing and it's apples and oranges."
While it can be tricky to understand the difference when the words "gender" and "sex" and "sexuality" so often are interchanged indiscriminately, those who have the privilege of ignorance by identifying with what is considered the norm, need to consider that not everyone fits into this false mold and binary.
The Trans Student Educational Resources website posted this extremely helpful graphic to clarify confusion about the distinction between gender and sex assigned at birth. The definitions below the graphic, also from the website, provide further insight. I love the Gender Unicorn because before I was introduced to it at a WYSE (Women and Youth Supporting Each Other) reflection, I didn't have a clear understanding of the distinction between sex and gender; I had never even considered the difference between romantic and sexual attraction.
Definitions:
Gender Identity: Gender Identity: One's internal sense of being male, female, neither of these, both, or another gender. Everyone has a gender identity, including you. For transgender people, their sex assigned at birth and their own internal sense of gender identity are not the same. Female, woman, and girl and male, man, and boy are also NOT necessarily linked to each other but are just six common gender identities.
Gender Expression/Presentation: The physical manifestation of one's gender identity through clothing, hairstyle, voice, body shape, etc. Most transgender people seek to make their gender expression (how they look) match their gender identity (who they are), rather than their sex assigned at birth.
Sex Assigned at Birth: The assignment and classification of people as male, female, intersex, or another gender based on a combination of anatomy, hormones, chromosomes. It is important we don't simply use "sex" because of the vagueness of the definition of sex and its place in transphobia. Chromosomes are frequently used to determine sex from prenatal karyotyping (although not as often as genitalia). Chromosomes do not determine genitalia.
Sexually Attracted To: Sexual Orientation. It is important to note that sexual and romantic/emotional attraction can be from a variety of factors including but not limited to gender identity, gender expression/presentation, and sex assigned at birth.
Romantically/Emotionally Attracted To: Romantic/emotional orientation. It is important to note that sexual and romantic/emotional attraction can be from a variety of factors including but not limited to gender identity, gender expression/presentation, and sex assigned at birth.
Not only is Jenner bringing awareness to the less talked about identities, he also puts a face, a famous one, to the issues so many transgender people have had to face, largely in silence. To those who question his motives, absurdly suggesting he has decided to transition to become a woman for publicity purposes, Jenner refutes:
We’re going to make a difference in the world with what we’re doing, and if the whole Kardashian show gave me a foothold into that world, to be able to go out there and do something good, I got not problem with that.
Also in the interview, in a very relatable way, Jenner explains how hard it was to tell the people he loved, especially his children, for fear of how it might affect them. Drian Juarez, who has faced harassment and violence as a transgender woman, related to the kind of fear Jenner described about coming out to his family. Jenner did not want to disappoint his children in particular and Juarez feared losing her support system and loved ones. Though she and other members of the transgender community were apprehensive about what ABC's coverage would entail, Juarez was very impressed:
“It almost feels like Transgender 101...
People of Bruce Jenner’s generation had a lot of misinformation on what being transgender is, and I hope they will be able to have some dialogue about this...I really feel like this is a turning point in terms of the awareness of trans identity...things are changing, and I hope this is a sign of how things can change for the better.”
Jenner and Sawyer did not shy away from the hard truths about what transgender people face every single day, as we've seen in the news with high rates of violence against them and disproportional poverty rates. A 2011 study by the National Center for Transgender Equality found that 41% of transgender and gender nonconforming people (of the 6,450 surveyed) had attempted suicide.
Just last December, the tragic suicide of Leelah Alcorn started a conversation about society's treatment of transgender people, when the suicide note she posted to Tumblr revealed what sparked her sense of hopelessness was her parents' refusal to accept her for who she was.
"...After 10 years of confusion I finally understood who I was. I immediately told my mom, and she reacted extremely negatively, telling me that it was a phase, that I would never truly be a girl, that God doesn't make mistakes, that I am wrong. If you are reading this, parents, please don't tell this to your kids."
Jenner's family, on the other hand, is setting an example for the rest of the world, showing their dad well-deserved respect and unconditional love.
Brandon Jenner described how proud he was, as a kid, when people recognized him by his last name as Bruce's son, the son of an Olympic gold medalist and American hero. Brandon's sentiments about his father now when people recognize him as his son are just as positive. He told his father during the interview:
I saw a sense of bravery that is, for all your previous accomplishments, I think far exceeds all of them, I’m just honored and more proud than ever to be a part of the family.The rest of Jenner's family also voiced their support on social media. Bruce describes Kim's support, which stemmed from Kanye's wise take on the situation. He explained to her, in one of the biggest moments of the interview that no matter what you have in life, a beautiful wife or beautiful baby:
"I’m nothing if I can’t be me.”Bruce's poignant interview, ABC's well-informed and tasteful coverage, and the great example his family is setting has inspired members of the transgender community and allies everywhere that this very well could be one of the biggest turning points of our time. Bruce has accepted who he truly is and it's time the rest of us do the same, both for ourselves and for everyone around us.
Life is hard enough without having to feel like you can't be true to yourself. Or that your family cannot accept you.
Bruce's interview is an excellent starting point towards changing this.
Sunday, April 19, 2015
Intersectionality
“So the truth is, even though we sort of feel like we have equal rights in America, right under the surface there are huge issues that are applied that really do affect women. It’s time for all the women in America, and all the men that love women and all the gay people and all the people of color that we’ve all fought for to fight for us now.”Her comments sparked outrage, of course, as they imply that people of color and the queer community, are fighting for entirely separate causes and that feminism inherently is an issue for straight, white women. Though Arquette did later clarify her intentions, this quote demonstrates what is perhaps the biggest flaw with the feminist movement, it excludes people by omission.
Intersectional feminism is the goal, but we have a long way to go before we get there, especially when celebrities like Arquette receive the most media attention and therefore define what feminism is in pop culture. To change these white-centric, cis-centric biases, we first need to change the discourses about feminism; inclusion, sensitivity, and awareness are essential.
On April 8, UCB comedian and Fusion writer Akilah Hughes, took changing the discourses surrounding feminism into her own hands, by posting a YouTube video explaining intersectionality in terms which we can all understand- fast food:
"While it's great and delightful to have such broad discussions about sexism and feminism on the Internet, it's pretty clear that the majority of the issues deemed worthy of discussion seem to only highlight the plight of White women."The video comes with a handy key in the description, detailing the metaphors Hughes uses.
**KEY**:
Burgers = Men
Pizza = Women
Cheese Pizza = White Women
Deluxe Pizza = any combination of gay, bi, trans, POC etc., women
She explains, in her own clever way, how it is hard to be a pizza in a burger world, but it is even harder to be a deluxe pizza when cheese pizzas are the only pizza ever addressed in the discussion surrounding pizza rights.
Intersectional feminism is not difficult to understand, but it will take some serious conscious-shifting to be successful.
Hughes sums it up best in her video,
As great as it is to uplift cheese pizzas, the world could use a lot more flavor.
Saturday, April 11, 2015
Bringing Sex Ed Back
The longstanding debate regarding sex education is misguided and
cyclical; in fact, the biggest problem with sex education is that we haven’t
figured out the problem with sex education. A recent study found that
millennials are highly in favor of sex education in schools, yet nearly four of
ten, ironically enough, found their own sex education experiences had little to
no applicability in their real lives. While this may seem self-contradictory, these
millennials are, in fact, right on both accounts.
Many adolescents are or will be sexually active and, without
access to medically accurate, complete, and unbiased information, they will
never become informed enough to navigate real world sexual encounters and
relationships. Sex education should be taught in schools, though fewer than
half of U.S. states require it to be taught at all, but the curriculum needs a
makeover.
What we need is an intelligent sex education that addresses the
real life situations of young people, who come into the classroom with
background knowledge and assumptions, often from the Internet or their peers. As
a mentor for Women and Youth Supporting Each Other, I have first-hand
experience augmenting misconceptions that our mentees, 7th and 8th
grade girls, carried with them. Several students shared the false belief that
using a tampon would “take your virginity”, something we had never considered
addressing in our curriculum. Others believed that you could not get sexually
transmitted infections from oral sex, which we were able to correct after a
student asked about this anonymously using our Question Box. It is likely that
the millennials surveyed found that the information they received, though most
found it to be medically accurate, was not applicable to real life because
their school-based sex educators failed to recognize and address the diversity of
beliefs and values in the surrounding community of the school.
Sex education
is about more than preventing pregnancy in young people, thought that is often
a way of measuring its success. In my experiences as a mentor/sex educator, we devote
several sessions to the topics of pregnancy and childbirth, always with the
awareness that in the area where we teach, teen pregnancy is very common and
often acceptable, but knowledge of contraception is minimal. An abstinence-only
sex education program in a community like this one or an outside educator
warning against teen pregnancy, when many of their mothers or siblings had
children young, would likely do more harm than good.
Our method, and a
good one for all sexual education programs, is SOY: Some do, Others don’t, You
decide. But the SOY acronym is not effective unless the students have complete
information to make an informed decision. Many critics of sex education
programs in general insist that it is the parents’ responsibility to teach
their children this information according to their beliefs and values. However,
family members, religious, and community groups might not have the knowledge,
skill, or comfort, to present all of the facts in an unbiased way allowing
adolescents to form make their own choices, as they will in adulthood and
throughout the rest of their lives.
Furthermore, if
young people’s only sexual education comes from their parents, who may in fact
be in a dysfunctional relationship themselves, how will they ever learn what a
healthy relationship entails- something only 45% of millennials were taught in
their sex ed classes? Furthermore, in less accepting communities, how will
queer adolescents learn safe sexual practices? In the same study, only 12%
surveyed discussed same-sex relationships in their class. A third, and
increasingly important issue missing from most sex education courses is
consent, which is problematic with sexual assault instances arising as early as middle school.
We need to build off the successful programs already in place and
implement them in schools across the nation, but not fall into the trap of
maintaining a rigid structure or formulaic approach as cultural considerations
and awareness of students’ existing beliefs are essential to adapting for the
needs of each classroom. Interested
parents should have the option of being trained on how to teach the material to
their children, but they should not be the only source of sex education; a
thorough and unbiased curriculum, with open discussions and a safe environment
for questions, is the only way to prepare young people for real world
experiences.
Yes, abstinence should be
taught as an option, as it is the only guaranteed way of avoiding unplanned
pregnancy or STIS, but not the only
option. And yes, the biological processes should be taught so students have a
greater understanding of their bodies, but that is not the only understanding
of sex they should have. If students know the scientific process of how to make
a baby, but don’t know the resources available at the Planned Parenthood down
the street, or what does or does not constitute consent, or if the relationship
they are in is a healthy one, or how having a baby at their age would affect
them in the long-term, or what other sexual identities there are when all they know
is what their heteronormative community has taught them is "normal", then sex education
will have failed once again.
Saturday, April 4, 2015
Whenever You Remember
I saw this on my Facebook today and it got me thinking about how we remember famous women. In Hepburn's case, I think this graphic minimizes her film successes (Breakfast at Tiffany's, anyone?) but does so in order to prove a valid point. I did not know Hepburn was a Goodwill Ambassador or about her Presidential Medal of Freedom and I think most people would agree that one of the first things that comes to mind when someone mentions Audrey Hepburn is her beauty.
This one-dimensional focus on a single facet of who Hepburn was is problematic, of course, but there are worse things than being remembered by history for your attractive appearance.
Just ask Monica Lewinsky.
Until her Ted Talk a few weeks ago, her name probably did not trigger connections to essayist, Masters, or social activist. She was merely 24 years old when her personal life became the focus of not only a federal investigation, but also the entire nation, including the relentless media, late night hosts, and scandal-crazed public. Her parents even worried she would quite literally be humiliated to death.
In the talk, Lewinsky describes "The Price of Shame" and advocates for a more compassionate social media environment, as one of the first to experience the "culture of humiliation". She is now using her voice to take a stance against cyber-bullying.
In a NPR Interview, New York Times contributor, Jessica Bennett describes the changing media landscape:
I think that over time there's been some public reckoning. And it's been interesting to talk to media folks about this who covered it at the time and now even look back on their stories and think, huh, that wasn't quite fair. I think that a lot of the language that was used back then - you know, she was called a tart, a tramp, basically everything but slut, publicly - it would never fly today.While the apparent success Monica has had rebranding since the Ted Talk is encouraging, the idea that this bright woman will probably still be forever remembered by many for her personal life at age 24 is upsetting to say the least. On the other hand, Bill Clinton has had arguably more influence and success after his presidency and is not only known internationally, but respected. When you think of Bill Clinton, his foundation or work abroad might come to mind first, and his infidelity much, much later if at all.
So if Hepburn, an actress and humanitarian, is remembered as "pretty", Lewinsky, with a Masters in Social Psychology and a successful activist campaign after her Ted Talk, is remembered, if I'm being generous, as "a joke", and Bill Clinton is remembered as "a leader" with little to no attention paid to his transgressions, is it really possible to deny a gender bias?
Who is controlling how these famous figures are portrayed and eventually immortalized? The media certainly plays a role and perhaps is now understanding the sensitivity and decency that should accompany that responsibility. There needs to be a change in not just the content that is created but in who is creating it. We need female content creators and we need feminist media consumers to demand this and until then, read everything with an awareness of a clear bias favoring males.
Thursday, March 26, 2015
Changing a Mob Mentality
On March 21, Farkuhunda, a 27 year old Afghan woman was attacked and murdered in the street by a mob of men for allegedly burning a Quran. She was killed mercilessly, her body run over by a car, lit on a fire, and thrown over a bridge. No evidence has been found of burnt Quran pages, what her murderers used as justification for their despicable actions, and her family insists she was a devout Muslim, even a Religious Studies major.
What is most problematic to me is the focus on whether or not she burned the pages, which all sources point to that she did not, and not the fact that regardless, what happened to Farkuhunda is a horrible tragedy. How in this day and age is it possible for a person to be murdered by a mob in a street? The excuses, conflicting reports, and misplaced focus on what she may have done before she was attacked, demonstrate the root of the persistent problem - women are not valued as equals, not just in Afghanistan, but in most of the world, today.
Fereshta Kazemi, an Afghan-American activist, elaborates:
#JusticeForFarkhunda is trending on Twitter and this mob killing has sparked a global movement. Tonight (Thursday) there will be vigils in New York City, Toronto, and around the world.
The protests in Afganistan have seen unprecedented participation. A justice and rights advocate in Kabul, Ramin Anwari, helped arrange a rally on Tuesday:
Anwari further explained that these protests aim to change the dangerous mentality in Afghanistan. Social media has already played an important role in starting this conversation and raising awareness.
Thousands of people attended Farkunda's funeral on Sunday. Though it is customary for only men to be pallbearers, her coffin was carried only by women.
It is deeply disheartening that focus on issues female empowerment most often comes after tremendous injustice. Farkunda should not have had to die so tragically for the world to feel something regarding the inequality of women in Afghanistan.
Farkunda will not have the bright future she could have, but if the momentum of these protests persists, hopefully this global dialogue will create a positive mob mentality, spreading the idea that women are people, women are equals, and that there is no place for violence against women ever, especially not in these modern times.
What is most problematic to me is the focus on whether or not she burned the pages, which all sources point to that she did not, and not the fact that regardless, what happened to Farkuhunda is a horrible tragedy. How in this day and age is it possible for a person to be murdered by a mob in a street? The excuses, conflicting reports, and misplaced focus on what she may have done before she was attacked, demonstrate the root of the persistent problem - women are not valued as equals, not just in Afghanistan, but in most of the world, today.
Fereshta Kazemi, an Afghan-American activist, elaborates:
“Here was this woman who was smart, and pious and very dedicated to Islam. She was exactly what even conservatives there were pushing for women to be like, and yet here she is dead.”
#JusticeForFarkhunda is trending on Twitter and this mob killing has sparked a global movement. Tonight (Thursday) there will be vigils in New York City, Toronto, and around the world.
The protests in Afganistan have seen unprecedented participation. A justice and rights advocate in Kabul, Ramin Anwari, helped arrange a rally on Tuesday:
"I saw young boys and girls coming with their parents. In the past, women marching in public was limited to extreme activists, but this time I saw families and mothers and housewives."
Anwari further explained that these protests aim to change the dangerous mentality in Afghanistan. Social media has already played an important role in starting this conversation and raising awareness.
Thousands of people attended Farkunda's funeral on Sunday. Though it is customary for only men to be pallbearers, her coffin was carried only by women.
It is deeply disheartening that focus on issues female empowerment most often comes after tremendous injustice. Farkunda should not have had to die so tragically for the world to feel something regarding the inequality of women in Afghanistan.
Farkunda will not have the bright future she could have, but if the momentum of these protests persists, hopefully this global dialogue will create a positive mob mentality, spreading the idea that women are people, women are equals, and that there is no place for violence against women ever, especially not in these modern times.
Thursday, March 19, 2015
India's Daughters and Sons
According to a very recent United
Nations analysis, violence against women and girls worldwide persists at
alarmingly high levels (Sengupta). While this generation has seen unprecedented
gains for women in areas of education, health, and political power, more than
one in three women worldwide experience physical violence in their lifetime
(Sengupta). Not even written laws are enough to stop this persistent problem
when enforcement remains unreliable and gender-biased social norms that have
existed for centuries remain deeply ingrained in cultures across the globe.
India proves a timely case study for these gender biases, as national movements
call for change of its treatment of women, especially after mobilizing in
December 2012 after the horrific rape of an Indian student in Delhi. It is
important to note that the way to change the gender inequalities in India is
not forcing western ideologies upon them, but rather to work within the
culture, especially with the strong, successful movements already in place.
Creating more laws and policies is not enough to implement lasting cultural
change. To change norms and develop a society which values women and girls as
citizens and equals, enforcement of existing laws must be dramatically improved
and women in India must have access to economic independence through opportunities
in the workplace. Additionally, indigenous methods of accountability should be
expanded upon as they create a space for women to come together in solidarity
and conscious-raising education of gender equality and mutual respect should be
implemented early and persistently in schools to male and female students. Such
a multidimensional approach is the only way to begin to address the
complexities of gender biases in India, which is by no means alone in its
inequality of women.
India is a rapidly developing,
democratic country with a host of laws targeting gender-inequality. The Indian
Constitution, in Article 14, confers equal rights to women, and yet this is not
in practice by any means (“Delhi Rapist”). It is easy to condemn the men who
physically and sexually abuse women for their despicable behavior but “these
men are not the disease, they are the symptoms” (“Delhi Rapist”). Merely making
laws cannot change the deeply ingrained practices that devalue women in Indian
society; solely emphasizing the role of the state has proven ineffective time
and time again. It is illegal to give a dowry and yet the custom is widespread
(“Delhi Rapist”). Similarly, in 1994, the Pre-Natal Diagnostic Techniques Act
made a nationwide ban on the use of prenatal techniques to determine the sex of
a fetus; this has been so poorly enforced that female feticide has led to a
noticeable gap in the male to female sex ratio (Dasgupta). One Indian woman summarized, “Law was made
for justice…but, for us, the law means nothing. We’ve seen the law, when it is
implemented, doesn’t work for us. It actually works against us” (Magar). Active
enforcement and evaluation of the efficacy of these laws is merely a start to
lessening and eventually eliminating the gender bias, but it is a start that
has yet to happen.
The lesser value as citizens
assigned to females is evident in the prevalence of physical and sexual
violence against them. In certain parts of south India the devdasi system,
which literally means “female servant of the gods”, has created such a
dehumanizing mindset regarding these prepubescent girls that when they are
raped it is not even reported as “rape” (Deshpande). These tolerant and even
encouraging attitudes towards rape and victim-blaming discourses are now being
protested nationwide in India, but their existence lingers. The attackers
involved in 2012 bus rape in Delhi not only did not show remorse in the
subsequent documentary, but also were bewildered at what all the subsequent
protests. Mukesh Singh, the bus driver, even stated in an interview, “A decent
girl won’t roam around at nine o’clock at night. A girl is far more responsible
for rape than a boy” (“Delhi Rapist”). Equally chilling, statistics show six
out of ten men in India have acted violently against heir wives or partners at
some point in time (Britto). This creates a cycle of domestic violence because
when a child sees or experiences violence they are much more likely to
perpetuate it (Britto). While protesting such disheartening victim-blaming
beliefs has started an important dialogue, it is not enough to alter entirely a
culture where these persist and women are abused more often than not. Especially
given the knowledge that these attitudes towards violence and women form at
such a young age, the solution must start with children, a new generation of
change-makers.
The patriarchal practice of
controlling a woman’s sexuality is by no means unique to India, yet it is
crucial to understanding existing cultural attitudes. A girl’s premarital
sexual activities, not a boy’s, are seen as responsible for a family’s loss of
status and honor in India (Magar). Constraints on women are an essential part
of a rise in caste hierarchy, and women, especially upper caste women, are
deeply restricted by a number of taboos (Desphande). They are the “custodians
of purity of the house and its members” and often must remain secluded
(Desphande). The defense attorney of the rapists in the Delhi 2012 case said in
a televised interview, and later stood by this statement, “If my daughter or
sister engaged in pre-marital activities and allowed herself to lose face and
character by doing such things, I would most certainly take [her] to my
farmhouse, and in front of my entire family, I would put petrol on her and set
her alight” (“Delhi Rapist”). The belief that a woman’s only value is tied to
her sexuality, abstinence before marriage and as a child bearer, specifically
of male children, immediately after marriage, is also widespread. Changing the
discourse to one that recognizes women as citizens, as equals, once again must
start at a young age and be taught to male and female children alike.
When females in India are not viewed
in light of their sexual value, they are often viewed as a burden to their
family, especially in terms of finances. Most women do not work outside the
home and will become destitute without their husband’s income (Magar). Such
dependence further perpetuates the male-dominated attitude in Indian society.
Even as children, girls are seen as a drain on their family’s resources. Ceremonies,
such as the ear-piercing ceremony and coming-of-age ceremony, are costly and
the aforementioned widely popular, though technically illicit, dowry
requirements are expensive, as well (Hedge). Males are socialized through
dominant cultural norms that it is their responsibility to provide for the
powerless, vulnerable women who are socialized to live as life-long dependents
(Segran).
The clearest solution, which also
would afford India significant economic gains, is to expand the workforce to
include women. But first, the stigma associated with working outside the home,
deemed a low-status pursuit, must be eliminated, again through persistent and
early education. The labor force participation rate, or the percent of females
above fifteen who labor outside the home, is merely 29%, whereas comparatively
it is 60% in China (“The Ugly Realities”). This figure demonstrates the
widespread notion that Indian women are not engaged in productive work and is
confirmed when they self-report as well (Deshpande). Not surprisingly, when women do work outside
the home, they receive poor earnings and lack control over their dismal work
conditions, which comes back to the issue of enforcement of equal rights laws. Though
gender gaps in elementary and secondary education in India are nearly closed,
the lack of women in the workplace demonstrates a problematic dependence on
males, reinforcing the current hierarchy, as well as widespread dismissing of
the contributions women could be making outside the home. Popularizing the idea
of women in the workplace could also give new value to women and girls, but
must be implemented in Indian schools by Indian teachers to male and female
students for greatest impact.
The value, or rather lack thereof,
assigned to women is best summarized in the Kallar saying proclaiming, “Raising
a daughter is like watering a neighbor’s plant” (Hedge). The aforementioned
illegal fetal sex determination test is so popular because of the widespread
preference for sons, which has led to the male-biased population ratio. While
women in the workplace would also eventually invalidate the belief that
daughters are simply a financial drain, currently, Indian parents value sons
also for the upward mobility they represent. Sons are the only rightful heirs
and only sons can perform death rites and light funeral pyres for their parents
(Hedge).
All of the offences against women in
India can be traced to when girls are not as welcome as boys from the moment
they are born: “If a girl is accorded no value, if a girl is worth less than a
boy, then it stands to reason there will be men who believe they can do what
they like with them” (“Delhi Rapist”).
Son preference, or the mindset that sons are more valuable than
daughters, is still so pervasive that studies have indicated gender gaps in
nutrition of children (Dasgupta). When brothers notice from an early age that
they receive more food than their sisters and other privileges, it is no wonder
that patriarchal mindsets and male entitlement persist. The daughters, socialized
as nothing more than drains on their family’s resources, are well aware of
their narrow escape with female infanticide.
The constant reminder of their second-class citizenship, full knowledge
of their unwantedness, and overall lack of freedom, much like growing up in a
culture of domestic violence, often leads many of these women to decide against
daughters when the time comes for their own families. “We (women) kill her
because we do not want her to suffer like we do” (Srinivasan).
The girls studied who were raised
around female infanticide all dreaded growing up, knowing societal requirements
would most likely override their own future plans and dreams (Srinivasan).
Unmarried girls are compared to “an inferno in the stomach” and therefore marriage
is prioritized over higher education or a career (Srinivasan). This non-negotiability
of a timely marriage severely limits the potential these girls see for their
own futures. And if they remain hesitant to set goals for themselves, it is
even less likely that the males in their lives will grant them this agency.
These problems of rape,
victim-blaming, son preference, domestic violence, and sexual control and
repression of females are certainly not unique to India, but the solutions to
change these social norms that have evolved and persisted for centuries need to
be. In this age of globalization, the preferred solution for a number of
international problems is often prescribed from a western perspective. This
lack of cultural awareness is rarely helpful and often does more damage than
good; it is a fallacy to equate Indian traditions with patriarchy and
oppression and idealize Western exposure as the key to progress (Desphande). An
excellent example of this is the resistance foreign social workers in India
have met in their efforts to stop female infanticide. Their admirable
intentions are undermined by the simple fact that they are viewed as outsiders
and interferences, therefore losing any credibility (Hedge).
The change of India must come from
India and progress has already been made. For weeks after the Delhi rape in
2012, unprecedented masses of protestors, men and women, took to the streets in
many major cities in India (“Delhi Rapist”).
Though India is by no means thought to be a model for gender equality,
these protests served as an example to the rest of the world and served as what
the producer of India’s Daughter
called, “the cusp of change” (“Delhi Rapist”). These new thinkers who
participated in the protests are indeed future leaders, but protests and
antiestablishment rhetoric do not create lasting change, they are merely a
starting point.
The long-term empowerment of women must
occur to reduce and eventually eliminate this gender bias. One such successful
indigenous approach, which combats problems of enforcement of Indian laws
against domestic violence, is the creating of mahila panchayats (Magar). These
all-women courts are inter-caste, self-appointed, and unofficial, yet respected
enough to serve as an efficient and effective means of justice outside the
official system of governance (Magar). The mahila panchayats schedule hearings,
which both the abused woman and her husband attend, and help the couples come
to an acceptable decision on how to proceed with their marriage. The tremendous
success of these courts in empowering and protecting women demonstrates how
solidarity and creating a public space for women is enough to challenge
traditional expectations.
An
Indian NGO, Action India, started working with girls in schools to begin conscious-raising
on a massive scale (Magar). Education is indeed crucial to the long-term
empowerment of women, but it must extend to males, as well. “Women have to be
considered as equal participants in shaping the future of society in India”
(Segran). Though the gender gap in elementary and secondary education is all
but closed, the separation of girls and boys in schools perpetuates the
prevailing ideas that they are not equals. Boys cannot be expected to respect
girls if they cannot perceive any common ground just like they cannot be
expected to view girls as intellectuals and equals if they do not learn and
grow together. In the existing system, the most common interaction between
young boys and girls is “eve-teasing” in which boys shout at girls when they
walk to and from school or around their homes (Srinivasan). This systematic
separation of girls and boys, combined with the preferential treatment of sons
and domestic violence in many of these young children’s homes, is an obvious
factor in the perpetuation of gender discrimination in India. The best way to
implement lasting change is creating a third space in schools where young
children are taught to respect both genders in a discourse that includes and
celebrates women. To work, this must be
persistent and implemented at the earliest age possible.
The assumption that Indian women have
been complacent in their mistreatment is a falsehood. They have a long
tradition of resistance and struggle both through organized movements and in
their daily lives (Deshpande). The general consensus among the various women’s
groups in India is that affirmative action in the political arena is crucial
(Deshpande). Indeed, if women in India had agency of their own, surely the
equal rights laws would be better enforced and daughters might be valued
instead of resented or cast aside as “Kuzhipapas”, babies of the burial pit.
But political power is not enough. Economic independence and the worth
associated with productive work outside the home would further change these social
norms, as well as leading to significant economic growth for India as a whole
(“The Ugly Realities”).
To remove stigmas with women working
outside the home, early education discourses directed at young boys and girls
should focus on the benefits this would have for all involved. Additionally,
the success of the mahila panchayats should be expanded upon. Indian women
currently in the workplace, though the minority, could experience similar
success through solidarity and critical consciousness, and serve as role models
to the young girls in the education system. The power of collective influence
should not be dismissed and may be one of the most effective tools in changing
social norms and sexist practices.
Condemning India for the prevailing
sexism is neither fair nor productive. Prescribing western solutions and
interference has, predictably, been met with resistance. While clearly the
sexual and physical violence against women must not be tolerated, the social
attitudes and norms that perpetuate these sickening behaviors cannot be changed
rapidly. The large-scale protests after the horrific Delhi rape of 2012 and the
recent media attention after the release of India’s
Daughter have done well to start a dialogue of change as well as to gather
these new thinkers under a common purpose. But with equal status laws for women
already in place, there is only so much protesting the system and the state can
do. Greater representation of women in Indian government could lead to greater
enforcement of these laws and a cultural shift in the value of women, in
general. But the most important and lasting means of conscious-raising is the
changing way in which Indian children are socialized to view gender. If boys
and girls can be taught mutual respect for one another, in a discourse that
values females for more than their sexual purity or son-producing capabilities,
a rape culture and victim-blaming society could be altered entirely.
Additionally, creating a space for women and girls to come together, outside of
the home, like in the case of the all-female courts would promote solidarity
and give women the agency to demand just treatment whenever the legal
enforcement of equal rights laws is lacking. Lastly, opening the workplace to
women and removing the stigma with work outside the home, would shift the idea
of women and daughters as mere dependents on their families and force their
family members and colleagues to recognize their value. The change in India
will come from within India, starting with the youth.
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